Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
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