Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Randomize
