I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
I want to make a zoo with you.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
whose ass print is on the piano?
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
