You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
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