if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
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