fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Randomize
