someone took a shit in my car last night and left $5 on the seat...
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
I'm always down for nudity.
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