I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
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