im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
Randomize
