Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
