he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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