honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
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