Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
Randomize
