Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
Randomize
