Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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