I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
