why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
Randomize