just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
Randomize
