alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Randomize