Porn is love you can see.
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
Randomize