Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
