if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
