I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
