So I answered the door in my underwear expecting my boyfriend. Instead I opened the door to Mormon missionaries. Do you think that was a sign from God?
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
Randomize