You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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