I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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