If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
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