Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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