It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
