she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
You made out with two different species that night
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
