No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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