I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize