I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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