WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
Randomize
