The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize
