just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
