he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
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Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
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I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
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