you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
areolas are like halos for boobs.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
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I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
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I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
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