Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Randomize
