Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
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