if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
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