do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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