Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
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