And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
