I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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