Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Randomize
