found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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