She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
So many bounce houses so little time
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
