It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Randomize
