why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize
